Misadventures Megaboob | Manor

Some houses have history. This one has assets. OPENING SCENE: THE CURSE EXT. MEGABOOB MANOR - NIGHT (1812) A thunderstorm rages over a ludicrously proportioned manor: two enormous, domed towers flank a central keep, looking unmistakably like a giant stone torso. A hooded alchemist, DR. MORBIDUS , is dragged from the house by an angry mob of townspeople holding torches and pitchforks.

“Big laughs. Bigger problems.”

Let me try— (She opens her giant mouth. Instead of words, a low rumble builds. She is about to unleash a sonic scream that would collapse the manor.)

He touches the pink crystal. Instead of smashing it, he hugs it. misadventures megaboob manor

Alistair’s tiny Fiat sputters up a gravel drive. He sees the manor for the first time. He takes off his glasses. Wipes them. Puts them back. The two giant domed towers loom against a blood-red sunset. He whispers: “It’s… perfectly balanced. Neo-Palladian with… late-stage Rococo protuberances.”

Alistair drives away in his Fiat. His toupee—still inflated—is tied to the antenna like a weather balloon. Brenda, Chad, and Mrs. Grimble wave from the manor steps. Mrs. Grimble almost smiles.

Ah. It got you. Don’t worry. It wears off by dawn. Usually. Some houses have history

(nervous laugh) How bad could it be?

(laughs) I’ll pay you in self-respect. And also cash. The cash is in the pantry.

So… about my fee?

Lightning strikes the domed towers. They glow pink. Fade to black.

The alchemist laughs maniacally as he’s thrown into a pit. He raises a skeletal hand and screams:

The interior is absurd: every archway is unnaturally rounded, every door handle is a brass sphere, and the chandelier is a series of glowing orbs. Portraits on the walls show ancestors with increasingly improbable proportions. MEGABOOB MANOR - NIGHT (1812) A thunderstorm rages

I curse this house! Any who dwell within shall find their most embarrassing assets… magnified ! Their hungers… insatiable ! Let the manor feed on your desires!