“You’re gonna need a bigger ticket stub.”
(Opening shot: Dramatic, Oscar-bait music. A lone valet stands in an underground garage. A T-Rex tries to fit into a compact spot.)
“One man… one ticket machine that only takes exact change… and 12 tons of prehistoric road rage.”
“The Trailer for ‘Jurassic Parking: A Valet’s Nightmare’” funny cartoonporn
JURASSIC PARKING — This Summer, Validate Your Fear.
(Final shot: The valet stands alone in the rubble of the garage, holding a single, unscathed “Claim Check #84.” He looks at the camera.)
“I should’ve worked at Chuck E. Cheese .” “You’re gonna need a bigger ticket stub
(Cut to a raptor learning to use a turn signal — incorrectly. It just claws the light off.)
(Montage: A triceratops parallel parks over three hours. A pterodactyl steals the complimentary mints. The valet runs in slow motion, clutching a key fob that doesn’t reach.)
“In a world…”
(Cut to the valet, radio crackling.)
“Sir, this is a no-idling zone. Also? I’m going to eat your clipboard.”
“Tip your valet. Or else.”